Could you use a confidence boost? In my talks with other freelancers and entreprenurs, it’s clear the strain of the past couple years is taking its toll. We’re burnt out, stressed out, and unsure what our best next steps are.
It’s no secret that navigating a freelance career is tough on all fronts. In addition to what’s going on in the world and with your family, every day you’re battling imposter syndrome while trying to find amazing clients and do work that matters, not to mention get paid well for what you do.
In my experience, it’s easier to stay (more) positive about where you’re going when you’re clear on what you’re trying to achieve. If you have a Big Goal you’ve broken down and are working towards in small, achievable steps, it can help you overcome the negative thought patterns when they rise up.
Want to go deeper? Check out 3 Ways to Maintain a Positive Mindset as a Freelancer
4 simple ways to boost your confidence
If you’re feeling overwhelmed and don’t know where to start, here are some simple tips for giving yourself a confidence boost.
Explore your emotions and find the root issue
If you live in the Western world then you know we love avoiding negative emotions and yet, understanding them and confronting them are important for moving beyond them.
Feelings of inferiority or insecurity are NORMAL and instead of feeling like a failure in these moments, why not take them as a sign that you’re stretching out of your comfort zone and explore what that could mean?
Maybe you’re triggered because of an unresolved situation. Acknowledge the painful feelings. Look for ways you can close that loop and work towards resolution. Give yourself room to feel the feelings so you can keep moving forward.
Maybe you’re feeling out of your depth and overwhelmed. That’s OK! Find ways to be grateful for the opportunity to learn something new, and then get ready to take big, messy action. Remember, failure doesn’t mean what you think it means. Your business isn’t a flop because you didn’t do everything perfectly. In fact, failure is necessary for growth.
Measure and celebrate your progress
Building unshakable confidence takes time, and I’m not even sure it’s completely achievable. But what I do know, is we’re so much more likely to fixate on what’s NOT working rather than what IS. Measure your progress, however you can.
One of the best ways to set yourself up for success is to have a clear picture of what you want your end goal to be. Think about why you’re freelancing, or why you’re trying to publish a book, or whatever it is you’re trying to achieve. Perhaps you want to hire contractors at some point and you want to understand how to stop time theft, or maybe you want to work less and enjoy life more. Why are you compelled to do this? What will your life look like once you reach this point? What becomes possible if you meet your goal?
Working towards something, something that matters, will keep you motivated and if you can find ways to measure your progress towards this goal then you’ll keep discouragement at bay.
But a word of caution. Keep in mind that this will not be easy! Progress and reaching these big, huge goals almost always takes way more time than we estimate and there will be a million reasons to quit along the way. Prepare yourself for this inevitable journey.
Mindset is everything
The longer I run my business the more I know this is true. Our mindset impacts our confidence like nothing else.
We all have expectations of how we think things should be, and daydreams of what our lives *should* look like. Most of the time, this isn’t realistic or even possible. And if we’re not careful, we’ll take the daydream…compare it to our reality…and beat ourselves up for not being more like the made-up version.
The way you talk to yourself matters, and it makes a huge difference to your confidence. Repeat something enough, and you start to believe it. So if you tell yourself repeatedly that you’re not achieving enough, you’re not good enough, you’re not smart enough…what do you think is going to happen? It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Choosing to use positive self-talk does not make you a proud or arrogant person. You’re deciding to be the best version of yourself. Maybe you aren’t in a place where you can look in the mirror and say, “Wow, you look amazing!” But maybe you can find one thing to praise.
Here are a few thoughts you could try:
- That colour really suits me
- I have a nice smile
- Those shoes look great!
Start small, and build from there. And when you’re at your desk feeling those negative thoughts slipping through your brain, try combatting those with some positive self-talk as well.
I’m so grateful I can serve my clients by writing every day!
Wow, it’s so cool they trust me enough to learn about this topic.
These edits are such a great opportunity to learn what my client expects. I’m so glad they took the time to let me know how I can serve them better!
Not easy, but necessary. Find ways to see that silver lining. There is one.
Take big, messy action
I was speaking with a small business owner who was sharing her story of deciding to sell her business and move onto a new project. She told me about how unsure she was throughout the process, and how hard it was to let go.
But you know what? Once she made the decision to sell, everything fell into place. She was able to let go and her mindset instantly began to look forward to what was next, rather than what she was giving up.
Much of the time, we don’t feel confident in our decisions until we’re actually taking action. And I know that’s so hard to hear (and something I need to continually remind myself of). What if I make the wrong decision? What if I end up going down the wrong path? Wouldn’t I just be better off by keeping things the same?
Action doesn’t have to mean literally selling your business and changing industries. It can be small. Tiny even. But motion is still motion. As you move, you’ll have chances to confirm if the direction aligns with your goals and expectations. And this won’t happen if you stay in one spot wallowing in self-pity.
Over time these small steps (and even missteps…don’t be afraid for things to get messy!) allow you to build momentum and before you know it, you will discover that ellusive confidence. Small steps can feel too small, or even pointless at first, but they will pay off.
This could look like buying the jumpers you have your eye on to wear to a networking even, or pitching a dream pub with an article idea in order to build a relationship with that editor and maybe even get published. Whatever your goals are, start with small actions until you have the confidence to take that big, messy action where you know it won’t be perfect, but it will move you closer to where you’re going.
Building confidence is a difficult, ongoing task but it’s possible, and you can do it.
One more thing. You may be interested in my free resource library. This is where I keep my files, downloads, ebooks, worksheets and whatever else I manage to create. I love sharing what I learn and want to keep adding to this library so it becomes a wealth of helpful goodness.
This is a free resource but I do require a password to access the library itself. You can get access by popping your email address into the form below.
